As a paid consultant for almost 30 years, (my first 6 month contract as a marketing consultant was in 1979) I came to recognize that there are two very different approaches to consulting, mentoring and the newest iteration “life coaching”.

1. The “problem solver”. This was the type of consulting I did. You take a look at the situation, identity the problem areas and provide solutions. Simple and straightforward. In essence, you are being paid to help someone help themselves.

2. The “psychological dependency” consultant. This is the type who looks for the weaknesses of the Client. Especially those that are primarily psychological. He or she then creates an ongoing relationship based upon exploiting those weaknesses.

I firmly believe that consulting, mentoring and life coaching should always empower a Client.

A good coach will always inspire someone to achieve personal greatness. Ask any world-class athlete about how important his or her coach is.

There will always be a relationship between a Client and a Consultant. I my case, I have made many life time friendships as the result of an initial consulting relationship. Maybe I was lucky to find myself interacting with people who I genuinely liked and believed in.

The secret to not making someone “dependent” is giving them all of the information and options available. Guide them to understanding the ramifications of the decisions they are about to make. Then urging them to trust themselves to make the best possible decision…

But never stand by when you see them going down the wrong road.

For some consultants, watching a Client go down the wrong road means more business… For me it means I failed to fully communicate the potential perils of that path. Then again, there have been those times where a Client only wanted another perspective and let me know at a later time that following my advice would have been the prudent decision.

-Bob Baran