The Best Years of Your Life… Now!

Victimology: Using a real or perceived injustice as the basis for excusing attitudes, opinions and beliefs which reaffirm and perpetuate personally destructive behavior.

Everyone of us has at one time or another been a victim. We’ve been on the receiving end and had to suffer because of it. Many times when we were least able to defend ourselves, our victimization created subsequent behavior that perpetuated that victimization.

Although we may not have been responsible initially for what happened to us or how we reacted, we must have the courage to intercede on the part of our best interest.

Victimology keeps us the prisoner of an experience by rationalizing our subsequent behavior.

Experiences which cause us to form habits that are self defeating, need to be illuminated and resolved. Not used as an excuse to perpetuate the attitudes, opinions and beliefs which foster the self defeating habits. Understanding the source of our actions is imperative. Using the source as an excuse to avoid taking responsibility, after the fact, for enabling the continuation of the flawed attitudes, opinions and beliefs is a de facto acceptance of fatalism.

Fatalism assumes you are powerless to change the trajectory of your life. Fatalism is a form of self imposed slavery.

Fatalism is antithetical to The Intentional Prosperity™ philosophy. It’s a way living that excuses your self defeating behavior and absolves you from the responsibility to take back personal control over those aspects of your attitudes, opinions and beliefs that support and rationalize it. Fatalism condemns you to repeat the original mistake and react to its consequences…again and again.

Becoming aware of the source of your self defeating behavior and accepting responsibility for altering that behavior is an act of personal emancipation.

It is a self-affirming act that breaks the chain keeping us the slave to some point in time, when we didn’t have the enlightenment or personal power necessary to avoid the negative influence of a relationship, thing or experience.

To become aware of the cause of your self defeating behavior and then deny the responsibility for taking action to alter the behavior, is the greatest form of self betrayal.

You have betrayed the primary truth of your life experience:

What you are is built upon the steps of what you’ve been, as you climb the stairway of what you can be.

-Bob Baran

Your mind is happiest when it is closed.

You know what you like. You know what you don’t like. There are no uncertainties because there are no unanswered questions. Your personal “do’s and don’ts” keep you secure and unwavering. Everything in your world can be catagorized into absolutes. This means all things are either “black or white” and are therefore predictable. No time or energy is wasted on “gray areas” which simply don’t exist for you.

Your closed mind allows you to predict the future and plan ahead with confidence. You will reach your goals, because you know you will reach your goals… And more often than not you reach our goals within the time-frame you establish. You’re perfect and your life is perfect… and you keep watch over every little detail to make sure it stays that way.

So, why risk the unknown?

Does it really matter that you’ve been feeling like something is missing, for years?

What could possibly exist beyond your firm control over your life?

Could it be the life you know deep down inside, you’re supposed to be living?

-Bob Baran

What haven’t you been able to complete?

Are there things that haunt you because you start them and then they just seem to slip through your fingers and never get completed? Does your energy and determination last no more than a couple of days before something else takes your attention away?

If you find that there are a growing number of these unfinished things in your life, it may be time for you to stop doing anything new.

That’s right; stop!

This may sound a bit unorthodox but try it and you may be astonished at the outcome:

1. Make a list of the unfinished things.

4. Unplug your phone and turn off your cell phone.

Now spend the those three days doing only completion work on those things that have the highest priority. Set yourself a realistic goal. If you can only complete one thing in three days it’s okay. If you find that you can complete several things, great!

On the fourth day, take yourself out to a nice dinner in order to reward yourself!

You may have to repeat this process on a regular basis in order to fully catch up. This approach can get you back into the habit of focusing, without distraction, on those things which you have determined are priorities in your life.

Disconnecting yourself from the outside world for three days may not be such a bad idea. People used to disconnect themselves from all the “noise” on weekends when I was a kid… but somehow the weekend has now morphed into extended weekdays.

Set a date and get something completed!

-Bob Baran

What do you do when you are overwhelmed? Many of us are conditioned to be passive and just “go along”. “Don’t make waves.” Few are given the training to say, “Whoa, that’s too much.”

At times, don’t you find yourself wanting to say to family, friends or life… “Enough! I can’t handle anymore!”
Or “Whoa, that’s too much information. I’m overwhelmed.”

When faced with overwhelming situations we have a number of ways to react available to us. There are at least 5 that I can think of. You may have some others you would like to add. (Use the reply box, if you aren’t in overload.)

When presented with overload; too much new information, another commitment or event here are some common reactions:

1. Be present and deal with it. Say yes, no, or too much and mean it.
2. Fit “it” in even though inside you are wondering, “What did I get myself into!”
3. Fit “it” in but complain to everyone who will listen, except the one responsible for the overload, that you feel put upon.
4. Ignore “it” and hope it will go away and that you won’t be called on it.
5. Meltdown! “It” was the last straw on your already overloaded “back”.

It is possible and even probable that you’ve felt or gone through any or all of these reactions at different times in your life.

The goal of The Intentional Prosperity™ System is to get you to where you can come from the first option. Be present and clear. Some examples would be to say:

• “Sorry, that doesn’t work for me.”
• “Yes, I can make time for that.”
• Or “Please stop, you are overwhelming me.”

One of the problems with saying your truth is that you are afraid you will offend the person who is contributing to your overload… One way to address that concern is to be aware of how you are communicating. Say what you are going to say in a kind way. Even so, you may still hurt someone’s feelings, but you may also help that person become more aware by being present and aware yourself. Aren’t we all here to grow?

Often times it takes going through a meltdown to realize that you need to make a change. You may not even be aware of how many commitments or how much information you’ve managed to pile into your life.

If you find yourself overwhelmed and getting close to meltdown, you can avoid it by taking a few small steps. You can start with saying, “Enough!” Just a 1-2% adjustment to your attitudes, opinions and beliefs, will begin a chain reaction that can help clear your life of the things that don’t serve you.

Good luck.

If you need help, give Bob or I a call 10 am to 4 pm Mountain time… 406-475-3458 or you can email us at prosper@intentionalprosperity.com

To your success,

- Gwen Baran

How do you explain a feeling?

It’s always the first thing you experience in any situation. Good, bad or indifferent, sometimes the first thing you feel is difficult to put into words.

What if I told you there was a really good reason for this?

I use the phrase, attitudes, opinions and beliefs quite a bit in my writings. There is a reason why I always put attitudes first:

Attitudes are the feelings which have a corresponding opinion. If you feel “funny” about something you’re experiencing a form of communication which is defining your opinions without using the left brain analytical side of your mind. You are bypassing logic. Feelings are a much faster, virtually instantaneous reaction to a given situation. It’s important to note that what you are feeling does have a logical component, even though you don’t immediately recognize it.

It’s the complexity of feeling which causes you to not be able to readily explain, logically what your feelings represent.

Think of it this way:

If you pressed five notes on a piano you would hear a chord. If the five notes are in harmony with each other the sound would be pleasing to your ear. If the notes were not all in harmony you would hear a sound that would be discordant. The same applies to your feelings.

When a situation arises in your life that causes feelings you can’t readily explain, it means there are a number of opinions and beliefs you hold that are not in harmony with the situation you find yourself in. Rather than going through the analytical processing of these thoughts, which could take time, you are given a feeling which is telling you to be cautious about the decision you’re about to make.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: “Trust yourself”.

As you learn to trust yourself, your feelings will become a more accurate measure of what fits your truth than any analytical process possibly could… and much faster.

-Bob Baran