Especially when you tell someone you’re going to do something and you find some excuse to get yourself out of it…

There you were, eyeball to eyeball, making a commitment that you already knew you weren’t going to honor. Instead you chose to say and act in a manner which you thought would hide the lie you were telling.

But, this is nothing new is it?

You’ve had a lot of practice with your “outside face”. You’ve hidden what you really feel and what your true intent is behind your mask, your entire life. You then use your power to rationalize to justify how you acted. You rationalize telling a lie. Once again, nothing new.

Then you come face to face with the “real deal”

Someone who sees who you really are.

This person will appear to accept you at face value. He or she doesn’t judge you out of hand. This makes you feel comfortable. That’s when you let your guard down, just a little. Now you begin to set your own trap.

You see, the person operating from honesty and pure intent, who says what he or she means, and does what he or she says, will always lead you into a situation which forces you to make a commitment. This is how truth will always set you up …to redeem yourself or expose your lie.

The commitment is often a “put up or shut up” kind of situation. It requires, time, energy and money on your part. If you were actually honest the commitment would be second nature, a natural extension of who you claim to be. You would either do it, or not do it. You would never say one thing and do another.

The commitment forces an inner confrontation between who you wish you were (how you want the world to see you) and who you really are…

The good news

The person operating from honesty and with good intent will have rapidly eliminated you from his or her life. Ironically, you actually eliminate yourself through your actions. Allowing someone to create a situation which forces him or her to act on their real truth, is fastest way to find out if they are “the real deal”.

From the perspective of the individual who is operating from good intent, many time wasting and distracting relationships, situations and things are avoided. Honesty and commitment are the most powerful tools an individual has to recognize and avoid energy wasting distractions.

The funny thing, is that the fear, uncertainty and doubt which the dishonest person has to confront as they begin to rationalize their lack of honesty, is all self induced.

The person operating from good intent will always have something good come from the relationship, situation or thing. Not counting the knowledge that he or she has once again avoided and prevented yet another “empty suit” from taking up space in their day-to-day reality…

In my case it’s often a great idea for a blog or article!

Next!

Bob Baran