Archive for the 'Emotional healing' Category

Published by Bob on 08 Jul 2008

The Boogieman Is Going To Get You!

For some reason “Boogieman” popped into my mind today.

I was thinking back, way back into my childhood in Detroit. Trying to remember the earliest cautionary, well in this case, outright terror tactic my parents used in order to control me.

It was the Boogieman!

It went like this: If I didn’t get to sleep by 8:00 pm (hey I was four years old) I could become prey to the Boogieman! You see, if you were asleep, you were safe. If you stayed in bed you’re safe. Under the covers … safe!

Once the clock struck eight, the Boogieman would start roaming the alleys of Detroit, looking in windows and if you weren’t asleep or doing a lame job of pretending, he would “get you”. The “get you” part was left undefined. So was exactly what the Boogieman was and looked like. I didn’t know if he was a man, a ghost or what…

This fear was reinforced by every responsible adult in my life.

So why wouldn’t I believe the Boogieman was real …and of course I was terrified that he would get me! So, when night came I was under my covers… usually wide awake!

In my small bedroom there was a window at the head of my bed. This was back in the 1950’s and we had venetian blinds. You could pull on a string and the blinds would swivel to open or close. Normally they were always closed at night… except for this one particular night.

I didn’t notice it until my Mother had left the room after tucking me in.

They were open! Oh, no! Only a thin piece of glass between me and you know who. I was petrified. Hiding under the covers didn’t seem real secure. After all he could be right behind my head looking down into my bed. Finally, I couldn’t stand it! So I made a plan:

Laying in my pillow looking back toward my left, I could see the string I was supposed to pull. My plan was to jump up in bed, grab the string and shut the blinds in one rapid movement …so I waited until the right moment and leapt out of bed and grabbed the for the string as I looked out the window.

That’s when I saw two eyes, wide open eyes, staring back at me from outside!

As I pulled the string and shut the blinds I began screaming hysterically!!

“He’s here, the Boogieman is here”!

My Mother and Father were absolutely shocked by the full-on screaming and ran into the room. They saw I was truly frightened and beside myself. I keep yelling “Boogieman!, Boogieman! outside the window! I saw him. I was closing the blinds and I saw him!!

“Ted you better check!”, my Mom said to my Dad. Her Motherly instincts told her something was wrong. My Dad who was a fearless Army Captain in WWII was outside in a flash. In a few seconds I could hear him tapping on the window and calling my Mothers name. She opened the blinds and he told her there was no one out there…

He came back in the house and after awhile I calmed down.

A few minutes before I fell off to sleep I could hear them talking in the kitchen in very subdued tones. I remember hearing my Dad say: “There were footprints in the snow and the back gate, to the alley, was open wide”…

“What?” was all I remember my Mom saying as I pulled the cover over my head.

Can you imagine how that almost forgotten childhood experience has probably resonated it’s emotional flavor in many of my life’s situations? Without me realizing it?

By the way, the next day I learned a new word: Prowler.

-Bob Baran

Published by Gwen on 01 Jun 2008

Too Much…

Have you ever heard that you are, “too much”?

What did they mean, this person who judged you? Were you happy and exuberant? Did you offer more than they could handle? Maybe the problem wasn’t that you are too much, but that just by being yourself, you made them feel “too little”.

There are so many people on the planet today, over 6 Billion!
I find it sad that with so many possibilities, some still allow themselves to be in situations that don’t fit… Never will fit… And are a cause of discomfort to all parties involved.

Say, someone tells you that you are “too much”.
What can you do? Consider the source…

Is this someone you truly admire? Have they accomplished anything of significance in their life? Are they someone you would want to be like? If not, then perhaps this is not a person that is contributing anything to your life. It’s time to move on… Your passion for life is not being well received!


Anyone who has ever been “too much”, is a person who is in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Given a different set of circumstances, you would be perfect! When you find your place and time, you will never be “too much” again.

To you being yourself…

- Gwen Baran

Published by Gwen on 19 May 2008

There is Hope

No matter how crazy our world gets, there is hope. Everything always works out for the best. Even if it doesn’t look exactly the way we thought it should turn out.

I know, tell that to the people who were in the two towers. Tell it to the one’s who were left behind. I don’t have a pollyanna response to that. It was a horrific event. I know people who were there. I know people who should have been in the towers that day, but they weren’t. There is hope.

Sure, September 11th, 2001 seems like a long time ago, however, it defines our world. There is USA pre 9-11 and post 9-11. The fear, terror and unbelievable horror occupied our minds for weeks, months and for some even longer. Lives were shattered in a way that hadn’t happened before in our history.

As a country, we have moved on. We had to. Hope is what keeps us going. Hope that we can rebuild our lives… And most of us can and do.

Right now another country is facing horror on an even greater scale. One created by nature. The earthquake in China has taken many lives and shattered homes and villages. When you hear the reports coming out of the area, they still contain hope. A man rescued 139 hours after the quake, 2 women pulled out alive after being buried for almost 7 days.

There is always hope. It is part of our human nature.

Wherever this post finds you, I wish you hope.

- Gwen Baran

Published by Bob on 15 May 2008

Where You Born With A Clean Slate?

Or were you born already burdened with baggage that determines how your life is going to turn out?

There is no escaping the fact that the family you were born into has baggage. That baggage becomes your baggage… Attitudes, opinions and beliefs were “put into you”. You became the perfect clone of the best and worst of your family… Then something started to happen:

You began to think for yourself… at least some did.

Looking around at the state of things in the world today, it’s obvious that the vast majority of humans fail to achieve the critical mass, in their lives, which causes them to question what they believe and why they believe it.

You see, if you are one of the few who have taken the best of what your upbringing gave you and worked to unload the baggage, you’re in a surprising minority. You actually questioned the reality of your conditioning and then took action to bring your attitudes, opinions and beliefs into balance with what you consciously choose to accept as your reality. Not what was given to you (as a child) when you had no possibility to know or understand the “truth” of it… if there was any truth to it.

To you who have struggled to grow beyond your childhood conditioning and the effects of your environment… I say two things:

1. You are the true light giver! You have, without realizing it, given inspiration to those around you that so much more is possible. Rather than wallowing in the excuse of victimization, you have proven you have the power to determine the outcome of your life.

2. Never give up! As you expand the self imposed barriers of your imagination into new areas of what is possible, you move all of mankind along with you. Your personal spiritual journey benefits us all. Never let the momentary feelings of being overwhelmed or discouraged become the dead-end of your journey.

There are billions who are a few steps behind you.

One day some of them will take the same steps you have taken and find themselves in the same place you now find yourself. The good your life has created will benefit those who, like you, have found the courage to step into a life they choose to create… not a life that was chosen for them.

In the end, your life’s journey will be a gift to mankind.

“Anything is possible. Your life is a Master Class on deciding how you prove it”.

-Bob Baran

Published by Bob on 11 Apr 2008

Honoring Your Past

Many of us have done things in our lives. The kind of things we look back and wonder how it was possible…

Because the person we are now could never imagine thinking the thoughts and doing the things we did in those situations. There were also things that happened to us, someone somewhere regrets for the same reasons.

This is the way of life.

As we grow and evolve we begin to recognize that some of our decisions may have caused hardship for others. Often to people we will never see again. How do you make peace with those you realize sacrificed some part of themselves in order to add something to your life experience?

You must first accept that because you now have the capacity to accept responsibility for your actions, you have grown and are no longer the same “self” you once were. What this means is that you are now a different person. From this vantage point you can see that every experience you’ve had, is responsible for creating the person you are now.

You must honor those who have made it possible for you to grow into who you are now.

You do this by consciously making choices that bring good into your life and good into the lives of others. You become a source of encouragement and support to others…even a smile and a genuine “hello” can have a profound affect on another person. You honor those who helped you to grow by continuing to become the best person you believe you are capable of being.

More important, you must become an example to others of your own enlightenment. You must live the fullest life you can imagine and are capable of. To do less is to dishonor and disrespect those who helped you grow into the awareness you now have.

The most important thing is to forgive yourself so you can accept the situation, open your heart and focus your attention on living the life you know in your heart you are supposed to be living.

Each person you touch with your good heart will take that energy forward with them through time and pass it on to others. One day your good energy will find it’s way to the hearts and minds of those you thought would never know the good person you have become.

This I believe and know is the way of things.

-Bob Baran

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